Before i give you a list of things to look at,, Lets start straight up, from the get go.
You said " I'm a woman, I don't know " .
That lame excuse may of worked for women living in the fifties when there wasn't a whole lot educational material available for the do-it-your-selfers,, but today with the internet,,cds,,dvd's, and all of the books in the bookstore,,,,,thats old hat.
First you can't accurately judge the engine temp by feeling the oil dipstick,,remember,this is an engine and an engine gets hot,,does your dash have a temperature guage ? The temp. should be between 180 f - 215 f . If you dont have a temp guage on the dash, get one of those candy thermometers,,you might have one in your kitchen, place the bulb end into radiator overflow bottle in your car, this can give you a so-so temp range of your car.
Your car is a 1993 model.
1. When was the last time the radiator coolant was flushed and refilled ? This should be done about every 2-3 years.
2. How often is the oil changed ? This should be done every 3000 miles or 4 months.
3. Has the water pump ever been replaced ? , a hot engine may indicate that the water pump is worn out.
When you replace the water pump, replace these items at the same time : Upper and lower radiator hoses, radiator cap, thermostat, heater hoses, be sure to use new clamps.
Yes it is true a vacuum leak could cause the idle to drop and it could cause an increase in idle speed,,,,as for the idle causing " All This " ,, I would say that you have several different issues.
Got to your local auto parts store and buy a service manual for your car,,read it,,there are chapters that cover topics such as trouble shooting and there will be vacuum hose routing diagrams.
Soon,,you too will be answering questions at this website